Parenting Criminals: How it all started

Recently i did an exhibition on Criminal Psychology and for that i had to read this whole book on the criminals of the world. Reading the crimes that these psycho had committed is really disturbing. The emotions i felt during the time i was reading was just those of the negative feelings - appalled, disgusted, hate, sympathy for the victims and family etc. Once thing that actually intrigues me is history of those criminals. While some of these psychopath developed their sick thinking along the way in life, some developed it since young. Some are like that because of Schizophrenia. There are many medical terms to describe why they are like that. But in the end, I actually felt a pang of sympathy towards them. Why? It all starts from family upbringing. Good family environment and good parenting are really important for a child's development. If they are lacking of  this aspect in growing up, you'll be sure that trouble will be brewing.

 I read that most of the criminals who committed hideous crimes such as Jack the Ripper and Andrei Chikatilo, grew up without parents love and care. So because of this, they hated women. In the case of the Chikatilo, his mother beat him if he peed his pants. Now, she didnt consider that he was just a child and he actually had a disorder that caused him to have lack of control over his bladder. If only his mother didn't act like that and showed him enough care and forgiveness, many woman and man would have been alive. 

As parents, children depends a lot on them. They learn to trust, love and behave through parents guidance. If they failed to show those necessary steps to their child, the child will grow up lacking faith in humanity. They can't trust anyone and think everyone hate's them, so it drives them to kill those they thought who despised them. They can't love if they have never been shown love. If all their life, their parents hated them, then hate is all they are capable of. Even if they don't start murdering people, they are bound to have attitude problems for example anger issues, social withdrawal or other behaviour counter to the norms.

Some modern families nowadays are really (lets face it) dysfunctional. They live their life as they want, being drama queens, imagining they are the heroes in a Hollywood movies and thinking everything will be fine. Like the Kardashians. Of course they love their life as it is now but they never thought of the impending future. The kids would be affecting greatly. I'm talking about Ted Bundy's life. He grew up thinking his mother was his sister. I wouldn't be surprised he went berserk after knowing it. Parent's remarrying and remarrying again, divorces, parents neglecting their duties, partying enjoying life or working and forgetting about their kids, these are bad, VERY bad examples of parenting. The best that can come out of it is the child following their parents footsteps, then again it always ends bad. The child would either trying to do crazy things to grab their parent's attention or they might vent out their anger on innocent people, namely, murdering. Robbing, drugs, violence, it's all part of the smaller picture of a child capability to do even more horrible crimes.

So the Kardashians think they are capable of raising a kid in this kinda environment? Well, go ahead. I see a future where they're kids are spoilt brats, attention seekers and spending money like its dirt.

Bullying, teasing and criticizing, these are enough to make someone go crazy too. Friends are an important factor that can also influence their thinking, take the "Chicago Rippers" for example. Those are friend influence. I also noticed that these criminals actually have a reasonably high IQ, they actually attended Universities. So why did they turn into monsters?

I can't fully understand why these people act that way. As students studying psychology, all we can do is try to understand why. Well till now, this is all i can derive.
In conclusion, people, if u want to be parents please make sure you really do a good job or else don't be parents at all. If you want to know more about Serial killers or criminal behaviour, you can watch Criminal Minds or read the book i read "Evil Beyond Belief" by Charlotte Greig and John Marlowe. CSI, NCIS and other show, they focus more on the general crimes and not serial killers. So criminal minds are recommended. Imagine this, the show is fake but there are real crimes like this and it didnt just end with 5 victims. Some goes up to 600 victims (Elizabeth Bathory). 

"Let's just be friends"

Ever heard this phrase? "Lets just be friends". I think its pretty common for people who are breaking up or being rejected when confessing. Well, the truth is, there is no such thing as "Lets just be friends" in a romantic relationship. This four words, once uttered, are relationship killers. There are cases where some ex lovers can still remain friends after a breakup though the chances of rekindling the romance are likely. And there are chances some people can still be friends with the person who once confessed that they like them.
But we can't deny the awkwardness that follows after the words "Lets just be friends" are spoken.

I'll take myself as an example, the guy i confessed (7 years ago) to told me "Can we just stay friends?" Although i say yes, its totally different after the incident. You cant look each other in the eye, talk, work together without feeling that awkward moment. So after a while, i took the step to stay away from that guy and he did the same. Ex-es too, you cant just treat them like friends after having such an intimate relationship in the past.

That's why its normal for two person to drift apart after telling either one "Let's just be friends". Human are egoistical creatures, we want to preserve our pride. I am no exception, i admit my pride is wounded. And seeing that guy just makes it worse. So why should i stick around and be reminded of the pain of being rejected. It is a form of rejection! 
So when someone says that, it automatically means you should stay away from them after that. Trust me, it'll save both of you much unwanted awkwardness and troubles. Everyone doesn't want to be in the friend zone with someone they like, i understand. So before you decide to confess to someone you like, make sure she or he is really interested. You might just save yourself the embarrassment and awkwardness.

Still too young?

What's up with some actors and actresses taking on roles not suitable for their age? They're like running before they even learned to walk. I get it, they wanna shed their young image and go for mature roles but seriously, they just don't look good. I take for example, Daniel Radcliffe and Zac Efron. Both of them had taken on very mature roles, romancing much older actresses like Nicole Kidman, being a stepfather/father. I found it very ridiculous to see Daniel with a moustache. It's like a kid wearing their father's clothes. 

That's just how it is, they have a baby face and they can't shrug off their Harry Potter & High school musical images. I mean c'mon, appreciate what you have.  A nice face? Act in something more age appropriate. Like Steven strait, he was 20 over when he acted as a high schooler in Sky high and The covenant. I don't mind, i loved him. Zac efron is still okay, shifting between mature and less mature roles. But daniel is like full on taking adult roles. 

Try imagining this, uh... ok how about imagine uh.... Daniel Craig as a high school boy. It's like that to me. I mean we all know daniel craig wouldn't fit as a high schooler cuz he has already established a tough image to begin with. Those who started with Nickelodeon, it's hard to shake off the Disney kid images. Not that i don't admire their determination to shake off that image. Still~ tsk, it's hard to watch. 

No i'm not a fan of Zac and Daniel.

Short story: Warm heart

The rain showered outside a cold winter day. Everything was frozen stiff; even the trees were frozen. She stared out of the window, watching the rain, waiting and waiting. It’s so cold and she shivered involuntarily, hugging her sweater close to her. The fireplace cackled, she turned and saw the fire dying down. Instead of throwing more logs into it, she turned towards the room.

Stepping into the bathroom naked, she felt the icy chill shot up her spine like someone injected a needle straight into her bones. She ran into the shower and turned it on. She waited as the initial cold of the water flowed before warm water started to come out. She turned the level to maximum. The first wave of scorching water was welcoming as it hit her back. She felt the pleasant feeling of her body relaxing, accepting the warmth. The shower filled with mist as she bathed. But she was still cold, her heart cold. She’s still waiting, missing that someone that will fill her.

Drying her hair, she walked into the empty living room in her warmest cashmere sweater and wool scarf. More logs were thrown into the fireplace and she warmed the dinner in the microwave. She sat quietly in front of the fireplace, staring at the fiery flames as it licks up the log in its fire. Waiting.

A flash of lights through her window and she looks up expectedly. She listens as footsteps approach her front door. The light rap at her door made her smiled and she went to open it. He stood there with a big smile and she buried herself in his embrace. Warmth spreads to her cold heart and she is filled. 

Nice guy/Innocent man characters: Spoilers alert!

I've already talked about the plot for Nice guy so a little recap, Kang Maru took the fall for a murder he didn't commit, to protect his girlfriend Han Jae Hee whom he loved with all his heart, only to be betrayed by her upon his released. So he used her stepdaughter Seo Eun Gi, to get back at her. And well, as you know all korean drama, he fell for Eun Gi instead.
Some characters inside are so confusing. I don't really know if i should pity them or love them or hate them.
For the case of Kang Maru, i love and pity this guy. Poor guy, he's been framed all the time. Misunderstood, betrayed, framed etc. You just have to wonder what did he do in the past that made him had such a rough life. To taking care of his very ill sister to being accused of murder. He is one unlucky man to have met some people in life. Maru is very protected of the one he loves and it just makes me curl my toes in excitement when he goes to save/find Eun Gi. And sometime you wanna punch him for acting like a jerk. He loves to take the blame for things he didn't do. Sadist~ But he's a great character. Gorgeous smile (compliments to the actor)~ ;) 

Kang Maru & Seo Eun Gi

For Seo Eun Gi, you just have to wonder why she had to be so arrogant, rude and heartless in the beginning. Really! She's so bitchy but well, there is a reason after all. She was forced to be like that by her father. Geez, her father, i don't even know if he's really her father. Biologically yes he is but he is ruthless towards his own daughter. I feel like strangling. no compliments, no affections, no emotions, nothing towards Eun gi. He even kicked her out and threatened to take her name out from the inheritance. So back to Eun Gi, she has a bad personality but there's one thing that i really love about her. She doesn't jump to conclusions all the time, unlike other protagonist. She listens to what the person has to say, observe, think rationally. After hearing about Maru, she didn't flip out. She calmly let him say what he has to say. Then she can make her own judgements. I really love this side of her.

Jae Hee

 Jae Hee, i hate her, i pity her. She had a rough start in life. Yeah, she's a bitch throughout the story but i still pity her at times. Her brother deserves to be in hell. She still loves Maru but she's so dumb. She doesn't think. I feel bad for her when Eun Gi was blatantly criticising her, showing her disapproval of Jae hee and her son. Jae Hee still has a heart surprisingly, she said she'll care for Eun Gi even when there's no reason to. If Eun gi was a little better towards her, it might not have been that bad. But she's still evil.

Laywer Ahn

Ahn Min Young- Han Jae Hee's lawyer minion who is so deeply in love with her he betrayed everyone. He turns out to be the story's biggest badass. Of course i see that coming. Geez.. a man can really do anything for love. He was the reason Eun Gi almost died, he's the reason Eun Gi's father died, he was the reason Maru was always misunderstood and in danger. I'd shoot him (his character) if i had a gun.

Attorney Park

Park Joon Ha- aww~~ hot, sweet attorney to Eun Gi. He really plays his character well. And he has the poor looks too. Don't get the girl but tries to help her as much as he can. He's protective, gentle, hot, kind and smart. What's there not to like about this guy? XD He'd sacrifice himself for her. Too bad Eun Gi only has eyes for Maru. :p

Jae Gil & Choco

Jae Gil- Maru's best friend. He's a bit stupid but very nice guy. Protectiv and caring brother to Maru's sister though he's not her real brother. Loyal, VERY loyal friend. Funny guy.
Kang Choco- Maru's sister. Sweet and kind. Loveable. She has a huge crush on Jae Shik.

Han Jae Shik- Rot in hell!!! He should be thrown into the pits of Hades. Totally useless person, total EVIL. Double headed snake~ you get the pic. He'll turn to anyone who gives him more benefits. I really hate him. I shoot him a thousand times more than Ahn Min Young. 

SME units

Is it just me, or do anyone notices how similar all the songs sang by SM Entertainment unit sounds. I mean really, don't anyone notice. I can't even differentiate who is singing the song cuz the melody sounds the same, the voice also sounds the same and the dances moves are really similar to some of it. Ok, it is original i guess, from them. And they are reusing and repeating the same thing all over again. Auto tuned voice, trashy dance moves, chorus all the same. Nothing is new, so i get bored really easily. The only one i don't get bored is BoA. She's good.
Don't believe me? Check out most of their boy band group's songs, at least some part of the melody and taken from some songs from their previous albums or other group albums. Super Junior, Exo K, DBSK, Shinee, Younique et. . These are just some of groups i noticed using the same melody. So SME is famous for their dancing, that i don't care. It's the songs. I notice super junior using plenty of their previous song to recreate a modified one and debut as a new album. Another way to rip off more money from dumb fans who doesn't notice it. 

Why decided to say this? Cuz i listen to their one of their unit's new song Maxstep by Younique unit. It reminded me SOOOOOOO MUCH of dbsk's songs. I mean when the other 3 member of DBSK were still with them, the songs weren't so standard. Now just with the two of them, it sounded all the same. Boring~~~~

Envy or Gratefulness?

I spend most of the time battling between these two conflicting emotions-being grateful or being envious. One is a positive emotion, the other a negative emotion. I was bored a while ago, so i decided to visit some of my old classmate's from primary school right till end of high school's facebook page. Well, just out of curiosity. I wanted to know how their life is now, how different it is from me.

 I saw many living lifestyle's that i would never have imagine them taking. Some married and building a family (i mean why? they're still so young and yet they chose this path. To give up the chance for a better shot of success in life. I just don't get it), some pursuing their dreams, studying in colleges, working. But what really brings me to my topic is the mixed feelings i get looking at their pictures, happily studying at overseas (something i really wanted to and yet can't). That emotion kinda constricted me.

I am really envious, they get to study somewhere they really want and be happy about it. While i'm stuck here in a local university, my dreams are not here but there. They say the grass is greener on the other side, i believe so. So what i'm doing here? Eating sour grapes, feeling bitter. 

But i can't be like this. Those people, they can afford it. I'm living on my parent's money to study here, i can't afford to dream big. We can't afford it. So i tell myself everyday how lucky i am to be here, to have a chance to receive tertiary education that some can't even afford. For that i feel grateful. I am grateful for all the sacrifices my parent's made for me in order for me to be here. 

Those classmates studying overseas, they have an easy head start in life. I might need to do some extra work in order to get to where i want to be.  I guess i just have to work for it, my dreams. Although envious, it doesn't really bother anymore that those people are there. They have their way of life, i have mine. We're different people, why should we be doing the same things?

I should be grateful. If i got the opportunity to study oversea's earlier on, i might not even meet my friends now. It's sad. I never knew the true meaning of friendship until i was 16 years old. That's why i don't call anyone i met before i was 16 a friend. Cuz that's what they aren't.

I will get there someday and i want myself to be able to lift my head high and say i worked for it. I achieve my dreams on my own. Till then, i should continue to be grateful. Where i am now, is a ladder for me to reach where i want to be.

Quote of the day

"Do I have to have her? If I love someone, do I have to have them?" - Park Joon Ha (Nice guy/Innocent man)

Man you gotta love this guy~ I know I do. He's undeniably hot, charismatic, smart, gentle and kind. The poor guy who wouldn't get the girl but will still care for her from afar, silently supporting her.
I find this quote really meaningful. In life we can't get everything we want, of course we try the best to get it but what's never meant to be yours will never be yours. So is it a must to have someone or something you love? His answer is not really and I couldn't agree more with him.

To know real personality of celebrities

Don't let tabloid fool you about celebrities behavior! Of course in front of the camera, celebrities know better than to misbehave unless they want to be famous for the wrong reason. I mean, yeah, there's plenty of celebrities who gain publicity through doing stupid stuff. (I'm pretty sure Kristen Steward scandal was a publicity stunt). Do you notice mostly their bad/true behavior's are only known when photo's were leaked, videos were taken secretly, observation from public. oh yes, the only way to know if that person is really who they are on camera, is (i suggest) watch reality TV show. 

Just showing a picture of the drama queens

Even if it's on camera, you can try to act as fake and nice as you want. But prolong exposure can make you forget you're on camera and there, the true colors of the person shows. Be it swearing and cursing, tongue slips, mischievios acts..... you will see and judge it for yourself. Then you decide whether you really like/admire/idolize/love them or not. For example, Keeping Up with the Kardashians. ugh~~ i hate those bitches. They over exaggerate things, fake everything and they act so innocently when facing the public. Yeah right~~ That's why i don't watch them at all, i just wonder why my mom and sis does.
Guys, they can be so charming in this industry but don't let them fool you. Before you fall head over heels for them, think carefully. Again, watch shows! Why? i'll give you reason why.
Lets take for example, korean stars (hot aren't they?) Jung yong hwa-CN blue, Nickhun-2PM and JoKwon-2AM. I watch them on the "We got married" show where they pretend to be married to another celeb (girls of course). Through the show, you see how they interact with each other and I can conclude many things just by observing. Observation! It's powerful. Though it might sometimes be inaccurate but well, i think it's one of the most useful tool. 
What i deduce? I can see that Jung yong hwa might be a really good friend, he pretty much doesn't suit to be a boyfriend. He's the kind that enjoys power and I can see he wants his way at things. He can serenade you into loving him them he'll be cold and sarcastic once you're hook to him. And he's not really romantic or his idea of romantic really doesn't work on girls.

Top: JoKwon & Ga In
Middle: Victoria & Nickhun 
 Bottom: Yong hwa & Seohyun

Then there's JoKwon, he's once hell of a fun guy to hang out with. Great friend, considerate, fun, and he's lovable. Girls might like him as friends but not really as a boyfriend.(or he's just not my type, too skinny). He's too shy at times it's unbearable. He is romantic but a little stingy, girlfriends shouldn't expect too much from him. He won't splurge until he's sure. i absolutely love his episode cuz it guarantee lots of laughter and "aww" moments.
For Nickhun, okay, he's really a romantic guy. He's every girls dream guy. Kind, considerate, cute, helpful, generous, romantic, fun... oh the list goes on. This guy shouldn't have any problem serenading a girl, those dimples are to die for. I enjoy watching his episodes and not to mention, plenty of "aww" moments too.

It's not easy to know a person in and out. What you see is how they react to public in general, to know even more, you need to go into a deeper level like friends. That's when they open up bit by bit. Think of it as peeling an onion, it goes from layer to layer. That's how we really know the person, peel their mask. Sometimes good looks are deceiving, write that down.

Some problem with Korean drama

Recently i'm kinda obsessed with the korean drama "Innocent man". I must say, they really portrayed the characters so real until i feel like choking the real actress and actor for being so evil. And Damn! song joong ki is just so handsome. Tsk~

But anyway, along the drama i've notice some mistakes. I'm not saying its just them, i also see repeated mistakes in other drama. First, the phone model. Sure, Samsung LOVES to promote their new phone in korean drama's and in this case it's the Galaxy S3. As we all know Samsung tends to come out with new models oh so frequently. So why is the actors inside still using the S3 after fast forwarding few years into the future? Don't most people already change to a newer model by then?

And the second problem... tsk, all the characters use the exact same freaking phone. It's only differences in colour but well, samsung aren't famous for their different coloured phones except Corby. So i see mostly white, blue or black in the drama. I'm not just saying Samsung, i noticed that in drama's using Sony phones too. Plus, oh they just love showing their phone features. Well, that's what we call product placement. meh.

Third, the oh so predictable endings at times. I can even be a director if you allow me to. <oh but don't worry i won't> Which is why i only choose specific drama's to watch. The plot sometimes starts with a bang then ends with a whimper, i mean WHAT? it suppose to be the other way round. And i really hate it when the ending sounds promising then it ended up tragically different. Geez!!!

Anyway, this is just the few problems i found irritating. There are many more but it doesn't bother me that much. Innocent man is a great drama to me, good looking cast and a nice plot. I feel bad for Song joong ki's character, always getting misunderstood. And oh my, the attorney inside <drools>... I mean the younger one<glare> lee sang yeob~~~ gosh, he is HOT!! So if you're a fan of twisted plots or dramatic turns then i guess this drama is recommended. Tho i warn you, you REALLY do wanna kill some characters inside. I don't know if it's a compliment or not. :/ It's still airing and i can't freakin wait  for the ending. >XD